16 April 2011

Day 8: Children's Science Exam

If you need a laugh, then read through these Children's Science Exam  Answers.

 Q: Name the four seasons. 
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

 Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. 
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large  
pollutants  like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

 Q: How is dew formed? 
 A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

 Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this!)
 A: Keep it in the cow.

 Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? 
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends  
to  flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature
 hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

 Q: What are steroids?
 A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

 Q: What happens to your body as you age?
 A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

 Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? 
 A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

 Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
 A: Premature death.

 Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen.)
 A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and  
the  abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the  
heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E,  I,  
O, and U.

 Q: What is the fibula?
 A: A small lie.

 Q: What does "varicose" mean? (I do love this one...)
 A: Nearby.

 Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
 A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome

 Q: What does the word "benign" mean?' 
 A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight

from: unknown source

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